PR people and corporations are just dying to get the attention and love of mommy bloggers. We’re like this mysterious creature they want to observe. Actually, we’re more like the cool chick they sooo want to be friends with, but they are so eager and desperate that it can never be.

There have been various fiascos, such as the Camp Baby Blogstorm. But hey, they say any PR is good PR, right? So if you hope to be the focus of some sweet mommy blog venom, and get all that great blog blasting that really helps a brand, here are some secrets to annoying the crap out of a mommy blogger. Cross your fingers! You just might tick her off enough to get her to blog about you!

1. Send her a press release. In fact, go ahead and just cc her on a blanket release you’re also sending to about 100 other journalists and bloggers. We wouldn’t want the mommy blogger to feel special, would we? We wouldn’t want her to think you actually read her blog (if you simply must send it directly to her, be sure you misspell her name, too). Better yet, just add her to the email list to get all of your firm’s press releases. She won’t mind getting daily press release email blasts that have nothing to do with her blog.
2. Pitch first, read her mommy blog later (or never). Mommy bloggers just love this. It really shows how much you don’t care. See, if you read her blog first you might get an idea of what she writes about, how she writes about it, or even if she has a policy of never doing reviews.
3. Learn nothing about moms or mommy blogging. That way, you can enjoy ignorant bliss and not realize that, for example, it might be an issue to have a mommy blogger event on Mother’s Day (or Easter , or Passover even). Request interviews during busy mom hours like mornings and afternoons (or 9-5 for working moms). Or at least insist interviews be handled by phone, because that’s so convenient for moms.
4. Have childless people handle the pitches. That way you can avoid the PR people having any idea what will offend, annoy or provoke the mommy bloggers. After all, if you have moms or dads handling these things, you would never have all that blog coverage Johnson and Johnson got for telling a new mom she couldn’t bring a baby. Because, after all, a no-baby policy at Camp Baby is impossible to resist blogging about.
5. Treat mommy bloggers like old school journalists. Go ahead, assume they will respect your embargo (or know what an embargo is, since they might not have gone to J-School). I mean, annoy a journalist and the worst that will happen is probably nothing, no coverage. But you could get really lucky if you annoy a mommy blogger, and get her to slam you in her blog (and probably copy and paste your annoying email in its entirety, including linking your email address). She might even tell all her network of mommy blogger friends who will also blog about it. Then they will all tweet, stumble and Digg it.

What’s that? You don’t want the wrath of a mean circle of mommy bloggers? Smart kid. If you want to do it correctly, I highly recommend you consult the great page by Velveteen Mind, Mommyblogging: the Resource. Be sure to scroll down to the section, On Mommyblogging and PR. Then also consult this great post from the Queen of Spain, “ So You Want to Talk to Mommybloggers.”